Do I want to wear makeup?

Do I want to keep wearing makeup? What would that look like?

Wearing makeup in public

I stopped wearing makeup daily because of the pandemic. Looking back, I realize that when I wore makeup in public, I was always thinking about how others perceived my appearance.

I like makeup as a tool for expressing yourself - but I would be lying if I said makeup is always, or even usually, used to express oneself.

Wearing makeup in my room

During the first year of the pandemic (2020) I was reluctant to give up makeup. Putting on makeup - the physical act of painting myself - always makes me feel better.

I found that actually wearing makeup was a different experience than putting it on. As soon as I walked out of my room I couldn't stop thinking: what do others think of me?

Engaging with makeup

I have been watching makeup tutorials and collecting makeup looks I want to try for years.

There are multiple ways for me to engage with makeup, though:

  1. Looking at other people with makeup
  2. Designing a makeup look for myself inspired by the work of others
  3. Walking around in that makeup
I like looking at makeup and designing makeup looks for myself, but I'm not sure how I feel about walking around in makeup anymore.

Passively enjoying makeup, without wearing it

I always like when people describe makeup application as the act of painting your face.

I feel at peace when makeup application feels like art creation - looking at myself in the mirror and drawing on myself.

What if I explore only the painting aspect of makeup application, without involving my face in the process?

Makeup paintings

I made these paintings using neural style transfer.
Image of makeup
Image of makeup

I still think about the ethical implications of neural style transfer sometimes - mostly the issue of attribution and credit.